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	<description>Isms Philosophy, Satire &#38; Inspiration</description>
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		<title>Stop Gravity Before It Stops You!</title>
		<link>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/stop-gravity-before-it-stops-you/</link>
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		<pubDate>Sun, 02 Aug 2009 22:54:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Blue</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Goofisms]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fun]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[goofism]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[gravity]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[You are the president of the National Society to Combat Gravity and today is Gravity Awareness Day. Explain to the public why gravity is a serious risk to life as we know it and what the average citizen can do to help fight the terrible effects of gravity.

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		<title>No Child Left Behind</title>
		<link>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/no-child-left-behind/</link>
		<comments>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/no-child-left-behind/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 02 Aug 2009 22:49:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Blue</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Goofisms]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[You are hired as a speech writer for the President of the United States. Your first assignment is to write a paragraph affirming the President&#8217;s commitment to public education. Before you can put pen to paper, however, an aide pulls you aside and lets you in on a little secret: the President can&#8217;t read any [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Potty Training Nightmares</title>
		<link>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/potty-training-nightmares/</link>
		<comments>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/potty-training-nightmares/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 02 Aug 2009 22:49:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Blue</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Goofisms]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.ismmania.com/?p=133</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Parents, are you sick of hearing how children are scarred for life by bad potty training? Now it&#8217;s your turn to speak up. Talk about how potty training your child has scarred *you* for life. Do you flinch at the sound of running water? Does the toilet flushing send you spiraling into flashbacks? Do you [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Polly Want a&#8230;WHAT?</title>
		<link>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/polly-want-awhat/</link>
		<comments>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/polly-want-awhat/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 02 Aug 2009 22:49:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Blue</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Goofisms]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[You&#8217;ve inherited a parrot whose previous owner was deaf and mute. It will be up to you to teach your new friend his first words, but your heart isn&#8217;t in it because your sweetie says you&#8217;re lazy and bad in bed and that this isn&#8217;t working out. You come upon the idea that the parrot&#8217;s [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Animal Friends</title>
		<link>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/animal-friends/</link>
		<comments>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/animal-friends/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 02 Aug 2009 22:49:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Blue</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Goofisms]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Penguins are poised to take over the world. They have the ants and the rats on their side. We need to recruit animals to our side quickly if we want to stop their evil plot. As the leader of the human resistance, which animals would you work on recruiting and what would you have them [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Blindsided</title>
		<link>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/blindsided/</link>
		<comments>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/blindsided/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 02 Aug 2009 22:49:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Blue</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Goofisms]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[The ATM industry has contacted you to help them with a sticky public relations issue. It&#8217;s been brought to their attention that they&#8217;ve manufactured several drive-up ATMs with Braille on them. Since blind people typically do not drive, this makes the manufacturers look rather silly. What kind of statement would you release on their behalf?

 [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Which Phobia Do You Want?</title>
		<link>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/which-phobia-do-you-want/</link>
		<comments>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/which-phobia-do-you-want/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 02 Aug 2009 22:49:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Blue</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Goofisms]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Sometimes irrational fears can come in handy. Imagine getting out of taking Rover for a walk in the rain due to the sudden and devastating onset of cynophobia (fear of dogs). Or perhaps you sleep in on Sundays because you have a bad case of theophobia (fear of religion). Now choose your favorite phobia and [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Strange Parenting</title>
		<link>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/strange-parenting/</link>
		<comments>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/strange-parenting/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 02 Aug 2009 22:49:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Blue</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Goofisms]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[You&#8217;re walking along the sidewalk and minding your own business when a reporter sticks a microphone in your face and says, &#8220;Quick, what&#8217;s the stupidest thing you&#8217;ve ever heard a parent say to their kid?&#8221; How do you answer?

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		<title>Revenge in the Mall!</title>
		<link>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/revenge-in-the-mall/</link>
		<comments>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/revenge-in-the-mall/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 02 Aug 2009 22:49:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Blue</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Goofisms]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fun]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[goofism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[goofy]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.ismmania.com/?p=112</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[You duck into the bathroom just before closing time at the mall. When you come out, you discover that the mall has closed early and you&#8217;re locked in for the night. While looking for a way out, you find an unlocked service hallway that surprisingly gives you employee access to the most expensive jewelry store [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Pirates vs. Ninjas</title>
		<link>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/pirates-vs-ninjas/</link>
		<comments>http://www.ismmania.com/goofisms/pirates-vs-ninjas/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 02 Aug 2009 10:49:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Blue</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Goofisms]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fun]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[goofism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[goofy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pirates vs ninjas]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[You have been caught in the middle of a skirmish between a band of scurvy pirates and a gang of ruthless, stealthy ninjas. They have decided to settle their disagreement by &#8220;letting&#8221; you select the winners. Unfortunately, the losers will probably make you walk the plan or throw a death star into your throat. What [...]]]></description>
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